We should be woo'd and were not made to woo

Helena's plaintive lament really hits home with a lot of women. The fairer sex is used to being pursued. And we all know men enjoy a good chase. So why can't we gals just be bold and go out and get what we want?

Well it's not that always that easy, psychologically. Men and women are just ... different. Is it because men used to be the hunters of the tribe and women the gatherers? So pursuing and receiving turned out to be the natural course between the sexes? And society has been priming us that way ever since?

All I know is that whenever I pursue a guy directly, it usually makes him uncomfortable. But then waiting around for someone to find me isn't going to work either. So a happy medium is in order.

OK, let's try to be subtle, ladies. We don't exactly want to trick men into liking us (we prefer relationships based on honest communication, or at least I do) but we don't want them to shy away from our direct approach. So we work around things. Encourage them to pursue us. Give them the go ahead to let men be men.

How does this work? The initial flirtation (like in a bar setting) would be to glance at a guy, then lower your eyes, glance again and quickly look away. Just enough to let him know you see him and that you are open to being approached. Then (if you're into this tactic anyway), just wait. You let him decide on the next move. From there, you can show your interest by being fascinated by what he has to say and letting him know you like talking to him (but only if you really do, obviously - again, we want honesty in the end). Guys have much of the same insecurities we do and are reassured when rewarded.

You can also just say hello, without pressuring him into anything else. It's tough not to say hello back to someone. Then just take it from there. That approach will work at a party setting too. Common sense, I know, but hey, it works.

In general, men and women react differently based on societal pressures, but essentially, we want the same things - someone to trust and to love, to have fun with and rely on. So letting each other play out natural instincts can help us achieve this harmony. Feel free to weigh in, since that's all I have for the moment.