Another Female's Look at Porn

Maybe. But I'm not going to get into historical depictions of the sexual act here. I'm just going to give you my perspective. If that's alright.

We all know men and women view (or feel) sex differently. And that's just it. Men are visual and women are sensual. Generally speaking, of course. This is all general, by the way. And again it's simply my perspective. So no need to present examples of exceptions.

I think there is a lot of fear, too much fear maybe, over this whole business. Granted, exploitation isn't fun for anyone, but I'm talking about consenting adults here. Professionals who chose this way to make a living. It's a pretty basic form of entertainment (and stimulation, right?) - perhaps the most basic. So why the fear?

Many women are uncomfortable when their men watch porn since the triple-x stars are naturally (to use the term waaay loosely) endowed to fulfill a male fantasy. And most porn is for men (you remember I said generally?) Some women get off on it too, so to speak, but we don't require all that much in the visual stimulation - we just need a little creative imagination to blossom and we'll ride those waves of feeling all the way home. Soft core will do. For most of us, anyway.

Hey, if you're really worried about your man being dissatisfied, maybe you should talk to him about it before feeling threatened by mere fantasy. Porn addiction is something else and covered extensively elsewhere in this blogosphere, so let's just stick to the average porn fans, shall we?

I can only speak for myself and say that it doesn't bother me. My father used to read PLAYBOY and none of us cared. My parents were always pretty open about human sexuality and so thankfully none of us have complexes about it (as far as I know). It used to bug me when my S.O. (when I had one, that is) would mention a crush on a celeb, but I had them too, so wasn't he allowed? So then I realized that when he watches porn, he's not rejecting me, he's simply following a more primal instinct toward fantasy, knowing full well it isn't reality (watch those who get those confused, however). Plenty of "swingers" are comfortable with alternative lifestyles and good for them - I'm not one of them. So no ménage à trois for me. But a little give and take in the role playing, sure. I know what I like and what my limits are and as long as the two of you communicate that, what's the problem?

Is it safe to say, generally speaking again of course, that more men are into porn and more women are into erotica? You know the difference, right?

Kate West Reviews

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